SWAG

Stuff We All Get.  SWAG.

James is on yet another business trip, he left yesterday.  When he leaves, one of the first things I do is put clean sheets on our bed.  I love Clean Sheet Day (yes, it deserves to be capitalized).  When the sheets smell of Snuggle, they're smooth and tucked in tightly, that's when I sleep the best.  If I had loads of money, I'd have someone give me Clean Sheet Day every day.

Last night as I was making our bed, I noticed a mini-pallet with a notepad on top.  This is obviously something James got from a vendor; perhaps a pallet-truck company or warehouse somebody-or-other.  The notepad hoarder in me (yes, yes, maybe another blog post someday) got a little excited by this new, unmarred notepad,  SWAG he got somewhere in his travels.

This got me thinking about SWAG.  What are/were my favorite SWAG items?  I got a great mini maglite from Conoco after I interviewed with them, but does that really count as SWAG?  I don't think so, since I had to suffer through an hour-long interview in order to get it.

My all-time best SWAG?  A mini-Swiss Army knife keychain, just like this one.

I got it my senior year in college at CSM during the fall career day. Occidental Oil & Gas was giving them out, hip hip hooray for Oxy!  This was high-quality SWAG, much better than those weird three-sided highlighters. Who thought these were a good idea? 

 

 

Sure, they might catch your eye, but nobody really likes them. The knife was also better than an inflatable beach ball, a squishy stress-ball, or yet another pen that will undoubtedly break after a few uses.

 

This Career Day actually took place on 9/11.  I bet Oxy felt weird when they found out.  The country was reeling, and airport security peaked at its all-time extreme.  I flew to Louisiana for an interview sometime soon after 9/11.  Funny, I remember the car I had, the hotel I stayed in, even how I was early to the interview so I drove around the area to waste 10 minutes, but I have no idea who I interviewed with!  The point is, I had that knife on my keychain.  After years of relatively relaxed security, I forgot all about it until I was half-way through the security line.  I knew if it was found, it would be confiscated.  I did NOT want to lose this knife--no way.  So what do I do with it?  Swallow it?  Eew, no.  Hope they don't find it?  No, because if they did, I'd make 9News at 5 as that crazy college kid trying to sneak a knife onto a plane.  So I did what I could--I took it off my keychain, and as the security line went past a huge planter, I nonchalantly dropped it in.  There was a space between the big planter and the actual bucked that held the dirt and the plant, and the knife went into that space. 

 

I thought to myself, "Ok, nobody saw.  It's not going to get taken away, and I didn't have to swallow it.  When I get back from Louisiana, I just have to remember to come look for it.  That'll be tricky, to do without looking like a major weirdo.  But it's the best option."  Sure enough, after the interview, I remembered to go back and look.  I casually walked to the planter and pretended to dig around in my backpack.  There it was!  So I just reached down, grabbed it, tossed it in my bag and quickly made my exit.  Pretty sure I didn't break any (major) laws.  If I did, I hope the statute of limitations has expired.  :)

 

I've told people this story before and they all think I'm crazy.  Yes, I know it's "just" a swiss army knife.  But it's a Swiss Army Knife!!!!  I still have it.  It lives in my car now; not on my keys.